A 23-Year-Old on Her Birthday

I'm the kind of person that always feels a little depressed on my birthday...

I really try not to feel like this, but a somber birthday rain cloud dumps on me every year despite my having a great time with people that I love. It's just not logical to be sad on your birthday, and I like being logical! You've been able to live and experience the wonders of life for a whole extra year. The day deserves all of the candles and balloons and birthday celebrations that accompany it. I'm truly lucky to be 23 on this beautiful, sunshiney day...

...But I'm just feeling kind of blah. To me, birthdays are kind of like taking a kid to Disney World after hyping it up to them for months. Once the day finally comes, the anxious kids practically pee themselves when they see the castle from afar, but before they've even made it through the entrance line, they're hot and tired and scared to death of Goofy and the other bizarre cloth creatures gawking at them.  

I guess that's what I feel- scared. 

Being 23 is frickin' scary. Maybe it's just me, but I think this has to be the most stressful year yet. When you're 23, everyone looks at you and treats you like an adult. But I am so NOT an adult. I don't pay bills, I don't have a job, I don't know what the heck a 401k is and I have no intentions on marrying or birthing children anytime in the near future. I just don't feel old enough. And it's scary to not feel old when you actually are old and expected to act like an adult. It's like today, I was in class and one of my classmates asked me if I was married and I practically choked on my broccoli and hummus. Um, NO! I still put zit cream on at night and watch Wizards of Waverly Place before bed time! 

Being a 23-year-old can be tricky too...

I'm not old enough to be married and have an adult life! But, I guess people do see me as old enough- especially now that I'm............23.............

Gahh, I wish I could go back to saying that I was 18 and have everyone respond with, "Awww...you're so young..." as they stared wistfully at my thin, youthful body. But now, I say 23 and people go, "Oh...so you wanna go walk the stairs with me during lunch? At this age, we need to jump start our metabolism." (True response from today...) 

I know I'm not old in the grand spectrum of ages and I also know that life doesn't end after 30. I know that there are many awesome things yet to come and that I should be grateful for every birthday I get...because what's a better alternative? 

I just wish I could be the person who goes all out for their birthdays and never thinks twice about the complexities of life and existence...

But I do. Which is why- 5 years ago today-I was curled up, fetal position, on my best friend Emily's kitchen floor on my 18th birthday, crying...sobbing...about getting older. I remember her mom had made me a cake that was blue and my friends were laughing at me like I was insane. Things don't change I guess! 

Besides the major depressive episode, I did have a great 23rd birthday and pre-birthday weekend with Kevin. 

Pre-Birthday Weekend Through Pictures:

I didn't have class Thursday or Friday last week, so Kevin came down Thursday bearing beautiful pink flowers and took me to Orlando. And there were many wonderful birthday surprises yet to come! 

We pulled up at the JW Marriott, right next to the Ritz and I immediately felt very posh and princess-like. 

Step One: Go to lazy river!

And after arriving and checking out our sweet digs, there was a knock on the door...

Maybe being 23 won't be so bad :)

 And THEN, my dear boyfriend totally surprised me with VIP tickets to see Arabian Nights...which I had begged him to take me to last time we were passing through Orlando.

Horses + costumes + pot roast = happy birthday girl!

And being VIP meant we got to go backstage and see the horses!!! Ahh! I tried smuggling my friend Sonny and all the other horses out of their stalls and into my house but they weren't interested....

Such a good man...and even though he might deny it...he LOVED the horsies too!

And if there's a buffet within a mile of Kevin, you know we will be there! (Golden Corral anyone?) SO we gorged at breakfast...

I fully enjoyed my surprise birthday weekend and was glad I got to spend it with my 200-mile-away boyfriend :)

THEN, if that weren't enough birthday fun...my dad woke me up this morning with this blaring:

Happy Birthday To ME! And I got lots of presents to open! Thanks Dad!

And then, I got to go to class all day...but I got brownies and a sweet note from "the girls in the front row." haha it made me happy :)

And thennn...I got home, ready to relax on my b-day and found my precious fur child, Tyson, huddled in the laundry room shaking and whimpering. 

Soo...I threw him in the car and rushed him to the vet and then sat around for an hour while he got poked and prodded. But Dr. Salzburg let me look at Tyson's x-rays which was pretty cool. Short story? Tyson was just having some...bowel inflammation...Oh, pets are so lovely. He's doing a little better now after I swaddled and rocked him to sleep :)

THEN, I went to my mom and bill's and ate delicious chicken and sweet potatoes from her garden. And opened more presents! And ate chocolate cake! And watched House Hunters! 

Wonderful day! And soon, it will all be over...bye 23rd b-day! 

I was leaving my mom's house tonight, holding my birthday loot, and as I was walking to my car I made a comment about how beautiful the sky was.

 It was so clear and the stars were so shiny and the beach neighborhood was so peaceful and quiet. And my mom agreed and said, "I wonder where we'll be this time next year..." Hmmmm.

Well, I'm off to bed and can't wait for my alarm to go off in 6 hours...not...kinda sad not to be the birthday princess anymore but we have a very busy lab tomorrow! Will catch you up as soon as I get some time! Much excitement on the 4th floor :)